Eating tears me apart.
So you're gonna be out of my life physically.
I know I'll never get rid of you mentally.
Kind of ironic I'm starting ED treatment.
Maybe it's just me rebelling.
But I don't think so.
I think I'm just tired of fighting.
Fighting a losing battle.
And I'm sick of it.
So I'm choosing what I perceive to be the less of two evils.
This is exactly how I feel. It's a never ending fight and it seems impossible to catch a break. It seems impossible to win even though it probably is with a lot of work.
ReplyDeleteI feel you <3 I know people who are "recovered/recovering" whatever that is but they still struggle with the thoughts. When I got treatment for anorexia I ended up getting bulimia, treatment sucks all they care about is that you eat and aren't at critically low weight, it's silly. For me the bulimia is more of a mind fuck and fucks with my body more even though I'm a "healthy" weight. You can be 20st and have bulimia hows that healthy. RANT OVER. It is worth trying treatment though, different things work for different people, the biggest thing that's helped me is having an ace mate who completely gets it.
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