Pathetic.

It's so fucking ridiculous.

That is all for now.

Incompetant.

Can't believe that.

Really can't.

It's absolutely disgusting.

They'll treat me for my physical problems fine.

But refuse to do a psych eval on me.

Clearly if I've overdosed.

Or cut, both even.

It's clear I need one.

Some people are unbelievable.

Frankie.

That one person.

Who can lift your mood.

Bring a smile to your face.

And brighten your day.

Shes my rock.

Nothing Left.

How the hell do I fix things.

Get my life on some sort of track.

I have no ideas left.

There is no fight left in me anymore.

Trapped between life and death.

I just want to sleep forever.

Bulimia.

Those feelings.

I hate them.

They happen every time.

Why do I not learn.

Binge eat and you will want to die, stupid.

Fuck you, bulimia.

You are destroying me.

Lost Time.

I hate it.

People telling me of things I've done.

Stuff I know nothing about.

It's scary.

And quite disturbing.

What if theres other stuff thats happened.

What if I've hurt someone.

Or someones hurt me.

God I dread to think.

I wonder how I act.

When I'm in that mental state.

Am I a completely different person.

Can I get my anger out.

Maybe it's something I should quit thinking about.

It's not like I can do anything to make it stop.

I have no capacity at those times.

Gah.

KILL.

ME.

NOW.

I.

CANT.

FUCKING.

COPE.

WITH.

LIFE.

Pills going down my throught pronto.

Millbrook.

Still inpatient :( hopefully be discharged soon.

Personality Disorder.

Ha. Apparently I've got one. Assessment for it on Monday. Still in bloody hospital.

Busted.

Pale, I'm still fucked on vodka and now they know. That'll be leave and fag breaks taken away :/ don't they yet that being here makes me want to get fucked up more than ever. Like seriously.

Alki.

You have no idea how much I want a bottle of vodka right now :/

Omg.

Fuck sake still in this god damn place :( sending me head west!

In for another week.

So much shits happened the past few days what a fucking idiot I am. Necking a whole bottle of vodka whilst I was on fag break walk back to the ward thinking they wouldn't notice at all. Remember one of staff come looking for me and he could tell straight away, walked me back in. Don't remember a thing after that. Been told I collapsed and then when they got me to my room I was bashing into everything so they put me in the lp room and I fully kicked off.

Assessment.

Hopefully I'll get discharged tomorrow.